Does the perfect girl exist? I personally think she does. She may not be perfect for you but in my eyes she is perfect. I mean after all God has made some of the most perfect things you could imagine. We have all seen that amazing sunset. Some of us who have traveled have seen some of the most magnificent views, waterfalls, oceans, beaches, mountains, etc. So then in all likelihood he made the perfect girl as well. The truth is most people settle without finding her. Even in my last relationship I would do the same thing. I felt like I was settling even though she was pretty badass.

I have this huge imperfection myself. I will find flaws in any girl that I meet. I know everyone does this. But I take it to the extreme. I mean a girl could do something that is so minute and I will hate her for it. Or she could have the tiniest imperfection and I will blow it up in my head as the biggest flaw on earth. Multiply that by several or many of these tiny little flaws and you see where I have problems finding the right girl.

I hate this flaw that I have. For the most part is unfair for the girls. But ultimately it will be unfair for me as there is a good chance I will never find her. I will either end up alone or disappointed with my significant other. Those are two fates I don’t even want to think about but they are staring me down. They are looking into my soul and ripping my heart out of my chest.

If I were to ever seek the guidance of a therapist this is the one subject I would talk about. I think I have to wrap my head around the fact that everyone has flaws. You just have to be able to look past some of these flaws and accept her for who she is. I mean for real no one is perfect. You could encounter a million different girls and they will all have flaws. Let this fact marinate with you for a while. Let it sit on your brain for the rest of your life and you might just end up being happy.

Therapy Session Over You may leave.

Its nights like these that make me wish I had a girlfriend. Its nights like these that make me want to sprawl out on the couch with a hottie and never see the inside of a bar again. What a waste of a night. I know why I never used to go to bars. Why I have been out more times in just this year than I have in my entire adult life. It’s because bars are for the most part super gay. Sure you might occasionally have a good time. Just the vibe of the room is good and everyone is having fun. Not last night. The night was destined to suck from the get go.

We head up to Finn as we don’t know where else to go. The place is pretty freaking busy, excellent. We get to the bouncer and hey you can’t wear that beanie in here. Well this set Lion’s frame right away into a bad mood. I talk him into going in wearing my ball cap which he agrees. It doesn’t matter that the place is packed with some pretty decent women. His mindset is shot and he isn’t feeling it. Hey I have been in that place many of times so I know how he feels. We bounce from here right away and head to uptown.

We figure we will give Republic a shot. We drive by and the place is a ghost town so we decide to head up to Corner Bar. Now I have never really liked Corner Bar. You would think everyone there was there to have a good time seeing that it is a little hole in the wall. I always get this odd feeling that everyone there is very cliquish and stuck up like crazy. You would think Republic or some way nicer place to be this way. But nope this little shit ass hole in the wall has the most pretentious people in it. I think it has a bunch of snobby SMU people in it or something.

So we walk in and I instantly have a decent feeling about this place. Hrmm this is strange it seems a little different this evening. We head around and up to the bar to order drinks. I get my usual and he pours crown on the rocks. We post up and just wait for girls to walk by so we can mess with them. The night goes pretty good but no real bona fide sets are run. We should have stayed here though. Things were in our favor in this place and we eventually decide to leave. Before we leave some girl walks up to me puts her hand on my arm turns right to me just stares and walks off. Very odd. She then walks back by a few minutes later and I of course open her. She is a little tipsy and way too forward. I start fucking with her big time running some major push pull. It is working very well and we eventually kiss. She wants more but I keep pushing her away. This works very well. You make the girl want more and more that her attraction for you rises. I eventually say you and I could never get along and I push her away so she will leave. This will either blow me out or make the next opener with her very easy. I figure the latter is the outcome that will happen. At this point we are going to head up to Sherlock’s. I stop by this girl before we go so I can number close. I guess she is so wasted or something that she denies me the number. Well that is the excuse I am making up. She wasn’t great by any means but she had this sort of thickness to her that I find sexy. You know the kind that is just a tad bigger but is tight. Very hard to describe.

We get to Sherlock’s make one circle and bounce. Once again Sherlock’s is gay for those who don’t yet believe me. We then head over to Finn again thinking we will close it down. We get in and for some reason I am not feeling it at all. Lion opens a hottie from France almost immediately. She was one of the best looking girls in the place but from what he says she spoke almost no English. Me and my friend are ready to go but Lion wants more. He brought this hand zapper thing with him tonight. You know the one you put on your finger and when you shake someone’s hand it zaps them. It doesn’t hurt it just catches you off guard. Once again this is a thing that I find hilarious and I of course want him to do it to girls. During the night I would even walk up to a girl and say hey have you met Lion just so I could see their reactions. So he does it to this one girl. She was maybe a HB4 which was mistake number one. Just this alone blew her out since I doubt she had much of a self esteem. But then he makes mistake number two. He does the rub on her shoulder she looks down and he taps her nose. This was the last straw for this girl. I mean she went absolute nuts over this. Yeah she was pissed. So she goes back to her big group of friends and starts telling on Lion. A few minutes later they all walk up and the big guy in the group starts talking shit to Lion. Once again I didn’t want this shit to happen again. I mean just like the last time we were out. He eventually leaves but he is furious and so are the girls. The girls are with him and when he walks off they start talking shit and push Lion. He flips the girls off and they do the same. Now this big dude is about 15 feet away just looking in our direction and I have to get involved. I start looking at the guy talking shit and he is motioning for us to go outside. I am saying sure go ahead knowing that I am not going to. His posse rolls over to us and is trying to calm the situation down. It eventually does and after a few minutes we decide to bounce.

As we are walking to our car a couple girls leave at the same exact time as we do. Lion immediately opens them and I try to wing. The girl I am talking to is just not receptive at all but his girl is. She ends up leaning on my car and Lion is gaming her pretty well when this entire group walks by. There are 6 guys in his group to me and Lion. I have a real life friend on the side as well but he is leaning on another car. I know he would have my back but he is currently in the shadows. I am pretty sure he could take on all 6 of these guys by himself. I know that sounds crazy but if you saw this guy and the look in his eyes when he is pissed you would agree. Not to mention he is a trained fighter I imagine that helps as well. The one big guy has a beer bottle in his hand. Yeah he snuck it out of the bar and is holding it as a weapon. I can tell the guy wants to do something but I can also tell he is scared. He is one of the bigger guys around that I am not scared of. Yeah he has 80 pounds on me but when you factor in his drunkenness and speed I have a feeling I would win. I tell the guy to set the weapon down and he does. At about this point the police roll up and this huge group disbands immediately. But this idiot makes the mistake of picking his beer bottle back up. Two more cop cars roll over to their group as they are getting into their cars. I have a feeling something bad happened to at least one of their group members.

We hop in our car and head home. Like I said what a waste of a night. I did the exact thing I said I wasn’t going to do anymore. I didn’t get in anyone’s face but I wasn’t against the idea of something happening. So I am pretty pissed off about this fact. You get a little alcohol in your system and you just don’t rationalize stuff properly. For now on I am going to tell whoever I am with hey man you are on your own if you start shit. I am going to walk away so keep that in mind. I just don’t need this drama in my life. It is annoying and it rest on my mind for the next 24 hours. There is nothing about it that makes it worth it. For now on you get in my face I will tell you that you are He-Man and I will walk away.

What a waste

For the past 6 or 7 years my mood has been greatly affected by my income. I have never had the traditional income that most have. I have never received a pay check. Well I did when I was way younger and had your typical teenage jobs. But besides that my income was always dictated by how well one or more of my businesses did. So as you can imagine my income would fluctuate radically from week to week and month to month. If I had a bad month I would be in a shitty mood. If I had a good month well I was on cloud nine and super happy. Yes I agree that is a fucked up way to be. In fact I have to live with it so as you can imagine I hate it. Even to this day I would still be affected in this same manner. The only difference is I go months now without a payday so I am used to it. I now look at my overall year and know it will be decent so I don’t worry about it too much.

But this leads me to a new mood swinger. And that my friends is women. I hate that I am writing that right now. I hate that they have some sort of power over me. But the truth is if I am not having success with women my mood tends to swing into the bad direction. So if you just read my previous post you know what I am referring to. I have number closed some extremely attractive women lately. I mean some of them are girls I would consider actually dating for real. They are the type that you walk into the room with them on your arm and the whole room turns and is jealous. Those types of girls. I clearly did something right when I met them. They were somehow attracted to me even if it was for brief moment. But then I try to start a conversation with them and they are dead. Or they respond only briefly never to respond again. These are all correct numbers. If I call and get their voicemail it is them.

What I hate is the truth. The truth is for whatever reason they gave me their number. Maybe they were tipsy. Maybe I attracted them enough to give me their number but then they realized wait a minute why the fuck did I give him my number? Then when you try to call them they just sit there saying I have no interest in talking to this guy.

I know this happens. I know I do it. If a girl calls me that I am not into I just sit there saying nah I am not going to respond to that text. Nah I am not going to return that phone call. So you can rest assured that they do the same thing. In fact they get hit on so many times a day they of course do this on a regular basis. Now the fact that they gave you their number though drives you crazy. Why not give a bogus number? Or just say no I am not giving you my number. That is the thing that drives us nuts. Haha maybe they do it on purpose just to fuck with us. I wouldn’t doubt it.

I spent some time thinking about this today. I came to the realization that I am the cause of this. I have started getting super picky with what women I want to mess around with. I will say about half the numbers in my phone are girls I have no interest in. I somehow got into a set with them; number closed them, and now have zero interest. I have zero interest because they just don’t measure up. I only want 8’s and above. I only want super hot girls that make your head turn when they walk by. These girls are much harder to game obviously. I somehow get their number but then it seems to go flat when I text them.

I remember a while back asking a question to myself. The question was something along the lines of: Do you change your game up for HB8’s and above versus the lower quality girls. This was not in reference to when you are meeting them. This is in reference to when you have already number closed them and you are calling them a few days later. Or even if we take it to another level you actually are out with them on a day 2. I now have a little experience with this. In my limited experience I am going to have to answer YES. They are a different breed. They typically have so many more options. And not just options but options with high quality guys. They can be picky and choose who they want to spend time with. Hell they probably have multiple offers a week to go here or there. Out with this guy or that guy. You are just another guy hitting them up.

Even though it is annoying and so much more of a challenge I guess I like it. I hope when I do start having success with these girls they also throw up crazy ass LMR. That will make me happy. Let’s hope they do.

I can’t believe I haven’t laid a new girl in a month. What makes it even worse is I bet I have gotten more numbers this month then I got in the first two months of the year. When I dropped my phone a while back I lost all my numbers. Since I have this new phone I have 11 new numbers in it with potential lays. Sure some of them are dead and gone but I would say half of the numbers are potential fucks if I play them right. I need to figure out what is going on. Looking back on the lays not all of them were great sets by any means. Surely no worse then some of the ones I ran to get the number close on the ones in my phone. I have a feeling I am getting lazy. Some of the numbers in my phone I maybe sent one text to the girls and then dropped it. I am not sure why I am doing this. I guess I have some mental block or something.

I think I just want everything to happen for me and I want it on a silver platter. We all know this isn’t going to happen. If you want to get with a girl about 99% of the time you have to be the pursuer. Girls are open to your pursuing them they just aren’t going to chase you down. I need to get off my lazy ass and start making some calls.